Hours n hours

Burning midnight oil, trying my best to open my eyes for as long as possible.

Writing lesson plan for 1 month for 3 group of ages in one night is a real challenge to me. Too focus on it until my mind almost not functioning so i decided to blog.

A cup of honey lemon from my dad makes my heart melts. He's so proud of his own 'production' and cant wait for praises=)) dad u r so cute n sweet=)

Planning these lessons makes me think of terry soo again. There's once we were playing see-saw together and i was trying to make the see-saw goes higher. N he was like so angry,staring at me saying : 不.要.摇.酱.大.力,等.一.下.我.pei.掉! I was giggling there n he stared at me like i'm a bad teacher. Thinking of him really makes me smile from the bottom of my heart.=))

Anyway, hope i will be able to pass up on time tomorrow. Or else i'm going to act sick tomorrow.

Blue monday

Another week begins, i arrived my workplace with my heavy mind.

It's heavy because there's too many things to really think about inside my small brain. N feels like it's leaking already.

I tried my best to continue my lessons till lunch time n i dragged myself to the canteen. Worse comes to worst, today's my turn to bath them. argh i dont have that strength already=(

And this last little boy came in to the bathroom. n he saw there's some scars on my leg while i was applying some shampoo over his head. n he told me: '老师，你的脚痛痛做么要帮我们洗澡？这边好像很痛叻.' and he tried to avoid my leg from getting wet. I felt like hugging him tightly at that moment n he reminds me of the pureness of a child. Somehow he made my feel secured to be there too. Thanks to this cute little kid, Terry Soo who loves mermaid, cinderella, pink n purple, flowers and ribbons.=)

hey dinner!

Comes to sunday night, have to eat alone again.

Dad's too busy doing his own thing, mom's having dinner with her friends.

I rather eat alone if i have to join those aunties, probably i will be stoning there until they wanna leave the restaurant which is few HOURS later after we finished our food.

Friends? They have their own dinner night with their families.

Then this is when i think that having a boyfriend is essential.

I know that's bad. Bt at least there's someone who's there for me to contact whether he wanna join me 4 dinner or not without any special reason. And at least he's there.

Anyway, this is just my imagination=) i know involving in a relationship is not that simple as i wrote here. So that's no point rushing to get a boyfriend just to fill my loneliness.

So for tonight, i'm having deli wings, mushroom soup, coke and hawaiian pn pizza from pizza delivery. I think that's enough=).

April, April fool.

I hope it's always just an april fool

during unpleasant moments in my life.

Early in the morning.

What a early sunday morning=)

i cant get into sleep anymore since i wake up at 7 everyday. I'm wondering since when i became so healthy.

Lying on the bed waiting for the time to pass isnt easy actually. So i decided to read some blogs.

Then i realised i'm a self-centered person(short form-selfish).

All this while i didnt even try to check out how's my friend is doing over there or friends who are just around me. I would say i'm too busy bt this is just my excuse of being lazy to care about others. It's like i never appreciate things that i had in my life. I will only concern about their lives during my sad or emo moments, times which i need them the most. This is just betraying the true meaning of friendship. And i know it will not turn out well in the end.

I wouldn't promise i will be able to keep in touch with everyone of them everyday bt definitely i will make sure that there's still them in my heart n actions will be taken to make our friendships last longer and longer and longer.

After a drink=)

Always have the feeling of blogging here after having a drink from starbucks:)

Yea such a long time this blog havent been updated,i'm too busy i guess or i dont even want to spare my time out for blogging nowadays.Btw there's something i just wanna express it out about my teaching life.

I'm working with children for about 2 months and i admit that i'm still enjoy teaching those kids:) It maybe quite tough to plan the lessons for different ages of kids and experiments need to be carried out again n again( in terms of the success way of teaching them so that they know what i want them to absorb) I know that attractive lessons are essential for them where they can release their energies by moving around but it acquires more preparation for me before every lessons. I admit that this is not easy for me to plan because they can get bored really easily. Their concentrations are low therefore i love to teach 5 years old rather than the younger ones like 3 or 4. I dont really enjoy teaching 6 yrs old because they are far too naughty n being soft to them dont seem to be effective. I hate shouting at them like a mad teacher and they dont know what the teacher's doing. Initially i thought teaching kids really tough job because the works are just too messy and i dont know what to start with. There's alot we need to teach them and the pressure from the parents is the part that i suffered. I think i'm just too young looking to tell their parents how their children behave or make them trust on me. And i cant focus on every child when i'm teaching so i started to feel terrified when their parents came to pick up their children. I think it will be worst when it comes to parent-teacher day:(

Anyway i will try to observe my children and i found that as the time passes, i really feel that that's a need to help those 'stubborn kids' to be well-behaved. It's a long process and it's not easy i know. Bt that's the reason why i'm teaching i guess. So hope there's some changes before n after i taught them the right way n i hope there's changes in me as well. I told them what's the do's and dont's n i need to make sure that i'm doing it as well. emm i hope i'm able to cope with those obstacles. god bless me pls:)

P/s: i know it's quite boring to read this so u can skip it if u want=) it's just sth that comes to my mind at this moment:)

很累了

我不想入睡，

我不想一睡到天亮，

我不想明早睁开眼，

又要面对这一切。

我觉得全部事情，

到头来，

还是只剩自己独自来面对。

顺其自然么？

要熬过这段时期，

已是翩体灵伤了。

不 ，开 ，心

你，

跟我过来，

跟我说说话，

我很想你在这里。

有时我就是想保持沉默，

有时我就是不想对着你 假笑，

但事情不是那么简单的。

我没有很轻松的在做事情，

做什么事情都好，

我都是战战兢兢的，

深怕我做得不妥当。

我觉得我已经很努力了。

我已不是我了，

我走不出来，

我不想留在这里。

我好久没有真心的大笑了。

=.=

where's my handphone???

变

在不知情的情况下，

好多事情都变了。

至今才真正了解原来一切都很简单明白，

是我想的太梦幻了。

根本不管怎样，变了就是变了，

之前妄想的意义，只会让我觉得我很糟糕。

很想狠狠地巴你

你，

托慢了我生活的节奏。

太好了，你离我远远的。

找一天

找一天，

一定要跟另一半，

不管一切地，

去追寻日落，

太阳的尽头，

彩虹的尽头。

=)

一天痊愈的时间，够吗？

从早上开始，

心情闷闷的，

不想跟任何人说话。

因为回忆里，

又多了一份不想回顾的记忆。

天气灰灰的，

好想现在是2012。

Let it out

Just found out that i'm still the same

cried for silly things, but that's really sensitive to me.

Although i understand why, but i just cant accept it,

I'm sorry if i'm rude, i know this is not the way.

n know wad? i hate myself crying in front of you, it's awful.

thanks google, this is what i checked out:

How to stop yourself from crying:

1. Pinch yourself (Don't pinch so hard that you cry from the pain, though.)

2. Lift your head to the sky

3. Yawn

4. What sometimes helps is just closing your eyes

5. Swallow saliva

6. Turn on some nice music

They're useful. But i wonder how am i going to yawn when i'm crying?

Another one

Kinda down these few days,

i know is emotional flu again.

Trying my best to avoid them

for worsening my day,

but they won at last.

I dont need a listener,

because i dont even know what to say

or what i feel, it's just that

i'm feeling down.

o.O

Craft? :)

Too boring at home,

i found something interesting

to release STRESS!

Guess what can i do with this? :)

Teng Teng!=D

Gnie's bottle=)

I wonder who wana buy my ruler;P

♥

Hi, my love!:)

ya i love myself=)

Conclusion of the day:

holiday makes ppl insane

c me=)!

领悟

我知道，

随着年龄的增长，

人生在不同阶段，

会有不同的领悟。

那在我这个阶段呢？

我不清楚，

只知道现在的我，

很想用力抓住每一份感动，

不想让身边的人

再从我生命中

溜走。

但往往真心想要珍惜的，

却最容易被唾弃，

与之擦肩而过。

等一个人咖啡

昨夜一口气把它看完，

感觉很爽。

不错是不错，

但总觉得太梦幻了，

世上没那么多巧合吧。

但也很喜欢阿拓的朴实与那份热诚。

九把刀说，

玩过拼图的人都知道，

复杂的图形反而容易掌控，

因为每一块都那么奇异，

很快就能知晓它应放置的座标。

但越是简单的图形，

如蔚蓝的天空，茵茵绿地，

却最难拼成。

因每一片都太朴实，单纯，

许久都不会明白上一块跟下一块之间的关系。

还有跟自己的 联系。

一开始就被这句话给吸引。

很想找回起初的自己，

我宁愿什么也不知道，不了解。

有些事情知道太多了，

往往会影响自己起初的决定，

也违背了自己的意愿，

这就是面具的由来。

谢谢委迎的这本书，

我好喜欢。=)

stupid exam :(

ARGGHHHHHH!!!!!

MY ENGLISH EXAM !!

=((((((

Fear

Ok, now i realised that i was stalking just now.

yea i'm a stalker , stalking for old relationship.

glad to see them live lives to the fullest, enjoying times together :)

But nothing seems to change here, i'm still the same ;)

but to be honest, there's some bitter feelings in me

even though i refused to admit that.

bitter as in feeling regretful =x

i know that's nothing to be sad or wondering why,

but i think it's just that i'm lonely sometimes,

just sometimes, luckily :)

Btw, wana share something i really think it's my biggest fear,

and sorry tummy,

i allowed too many butterflies in you.

Exam starts from tomorrow.

=(

Bites

a can of antioxidant lipton ice tea

My econs book

Four pair of Deli wings

A personal hawaiian pan pizza

Sounds not bad?

But it feels bad eating alone.

But once in a while is ok laa.

=)

2.oo, am

Jing Nie is still thinking what can she do now

besides than sleeping, studying and staring the bed.

*O.o*

1.oo, am

I guess i started to miss my friends..

including the one i shouldnt miss.

Just came back from a wedding dinner,

i never like the environment during most of the wedding dinners

I thought the meanings are gone.

It's not just about wishing the newlywed,

but comparing among each other that makes me sick.

But overall tonight's dinner was okay, just abit boring.

There's some interesting conversation between me n chai ying,

hahaa so happy she called me just now.

At least we're still joint together=)

Next week is my study week.

telling myself not to waste this week again,

but study mood is still not on yet.

suddenly feel so upset of it.

Anyway, life is still beautiful to me=)

Sammi Cheng

她很坚强, 好让人心疼。

我支持你!

so random

Nothing special to mention or express here,

just thought of posting something here=)

Wana post something about my birthday,

bt is kind of lazy to upload those photos =X

Someday la, i will definitely post them on someday=)

It's quite late now,

bt the feeling of sleeping doesnt knock my mind

Feel like wana emo abit>.<

lol, i think i'm a bit psychotic liao X)

k la, so boring, very boring today, because i skipped my classes today.

n the weather was so hot these few days =.=

herrhaih..

**

Complicated feelings!

Nothing hurts me but those mixed feelings keep disrupting me,

like i ate something tasteless yet some bitter.

Haih,why us human being need emotions, feelings and thoughts?

err, these make us unique..i know..

but these also complicate everything.

Anyway, pray for me for my final.

Pls ESL, pls dont dissapoint me=(

Gambateh la jing nie, i know u can do it..

:')

The letter

I felt so guilty now.

The offer letter has arrived,

'Congratulations, I am pleased to offer you a place in the following course..'

Yea, very happy.

But the fees are 'awesome'

n it's in $AUD.

I feel like telling my parents,

sorry for not paying attention in class sometimes,

sorry for not really trying my very best in achieving colourful results,

sorry for being selfish all this while.

=(

What do u wish for if everyone owns a wish now?

I wish that everything will not change

from this moment.

I can be ur hero, baby

Being abit notti just now..hehe, u know what i mean=D

Anyway, i love this song.

It triggers all my memories.

好静

讨厌星期五的夜晚，

想找个人说话都没有。

星期五提醒了我，

原来我始终是一个人的。

或许我对寂寞的来临特别敏感吧。

既使在人潮中，

也抵挡不住寂寞的侵袭，

脑袋有说不清的疑惑。

但我知道，

其实我们都寂寞。

唉，我，

跟王力宏一样，

需要人陪。

唯一

這樣的説法，不是不想給對方一個名分，

只是我覺得《情人》這個名詞非常脆弱。

對我來説，我會把對方當成是我的家人，

因爲只要把對方認爲是家人，

你就永遠不用害怕會失去對方，

當然對方也必須和你一樣的想法。

- 類似家人的情人 <无比> -

这篇文章让我有些感触。

对啊，

像家人一样的情人最好了。

既使打打闹闹，

那份关怀，

是不会像过气情人般

轻易被抹去的。